Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Listening to JRL Live

I've been listening to tracks from the JRL Farewell Concert. It's great to listen to these songs again, especially with these arrangements and live energy. There's a great collection of musicians playing on these songs -- still pretty crazy to think about how many musicians participated in that event.

Anyway I'm finalizing track order for the live CD and hope to have the CD online for download and available for purchase by late November. I think it'll be a pretty good bookend to the JRL years.

Track list: Better, 29 Years, Sunslide, Better Days, Carbon Blanket, Times Squared, Sunfire Faces, Just To Be Loved.

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Saturday, October 24, 2009

The Adrenalin Zone and 360 Degrees

I've been laid out sick for the last five days. Didn't listen to music or watch Hulu part of the time -- the sound hurt my head. It's been a while since I've been sick like that.

Something cool happened in the process: I slowed down.

You know the power of adrenalin to help you focus and tune out everything else? I think I have lived a lot of the last two decades in an adrenalin-like state, focusing on one vision or problem and blocking everything else out, then shifting to another one and blocking everything else, etc etc.

It feels strange and wonderful to be seeing 360 degrees, aware of my surroundings. I have a sense of the whole of my life: body, mind, relationships, emotions, projects, and dreams.

I've been aware of and had the tools to track the big picture, I've just done it from the adrenalin zone. I had good categories for the different parts of my life -- what I haven't had was the sense of being in touch with them all at once (or even peacefully scanning between them as opposed to panic-battle-mode leaping from fire to fire).

Oh, and by the way, it's not hard to find music and movies that keep you in that same adrenalin zone.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Part II Delusion and Dreams

Despite over a decade of doing concerts that averaged under 100 people, I still have dreams of my music impacting lots of people. But music is just one part of my life, and not even a top priority currently. Are those dreams delusions?

More relevant data: 1. I've played some larger shows, 2. I've gotten encouraging feedback about my songwriting from professionals, 3. one song I wrote has impacted a lot people, 4. my music has helped people in real ways.

There's some evidence my music has potential to be enjoyed and useful beyond my immediate circle of relationships. That doesn't really settle the issue of whether it's delusional or even helpful to hope for a really big impact. I have questions about whether the benefits of greater success would outweigh its costs and challenges. In my life I've seen great value in dreams: in having them, pursuing them, and in becoming wiser about what you will and will not sacrifice to attain them.